I am always amused how easily we find things to which we attribute our good luck and our misfortunes to . If things work out well it is because of the extra alphabet added to the name or some obscenely large and gaudily coloured gemstone worn next to the skin. I think the only person whom makes maximum money with the "Fortune " plants is the Charlie who sells those bamboo shoots all tied up with red ribbons . The ugly pussycat in garish gold known as Goodluck Kitty is something my mother could have used in my growing year to scare me with . Thank God , they were not found on every mantle-piece or corner shelf, like they are now. There is something very creepy about the the way the Kitty waves a paw as if to beckons me to some ghoulish world if I do not down the veggies .
If I was still a kid I would certainly scream with fright and have nightmares after seeing one of those Santas who besiege every mall before Christmas They peep from behind the hideous Made-in-China masks. They hardly look jolly and benign , more like trolls and fiends that descend on evil nights to carry one away screaming to the nether world. But the question still rattles in my brain : why do people attach good luck and bad luck to things? I had a friend in school who insisted that it as the blue panties that she wore for every Maths exam that helped her score her centums . So, it wasn't the hours she spent practising and solving hundreds of maths problems, it wasn't the dedication of Mrs Britto who taught us so thoroughly and inculcated in us the love for numbers - oh no , not at all! It was this wispy itsy bitsy lace thing that did it . I wonder whether it has survived the onslaught of time and does she still wear it to her Board Meetings ?However, I do owe her much in life for it was she who got me off irrational beliefs of all kinds. How can a lizard who spends his entire life stuck with suction pads to a ceiling be a harbinger of Death if he falls on my head ? Greater possibility of me screaming and jumping up and down than curling up and dying. I truly believe there is a black cat out there somewhere telling her lovely little kittens to be careful of a white woman crossing their path. A family I know not only believes thirteen is unlucky but the multiples of thirteen are unlucky too. Luckily for the kids of the family , the elders are not very strong on counting beyond 13x3 .
I take great comfort in the fact that all religions assure me that everything is pre-ordained and I have come into this world like a packaged product with an expiry date . Sometimes the " Best Before ", or the "Use By " date also becomes applicable ; as in the case of job eligibility and marriage proposals . So the Big Guy ( or Gal , as the case maybe ) is up there in the Heavens with the headphones on , listening to all the whining, groaning, moaning pleading , cajoling , bribing etc from down below ; and humming " I am gonna get you anyway...." This is why when I need to tune into His /Her frequency I rarely do it on my knees . Just a hale-fellow-well-met kind of conversation works just as well for me - a mild conversation for some gentle tweaking within permissible limits is all one can ask for ( after all it's all pre-ordained , remember?)
This is the wedding season , actually it is always the wedding season if one were to believe the advts and free attachments that come with your regular newspaper. The one thing I thoroughly enjoy at weddings is the element of surprise . The charming pretty girl you knew all along could turn up to be almost anything on her wedding day : Bat Woman with exaggerated winged eyes , the alien from the movie Predator with long ringlets reaching out beyond her face and waving around with a life of their own , a creature from the movie Species glistening and glittering and with shimmery blue hued eyes. Some look so different that I have almost left the wedding venue sure that I had gate crashed into the wrong one. Imagine if the groom were to shout: " But that's not her..........." when he gets a glimpse of her heavily-made up totally-changed face How do the petite lithe girls turn into these muscle women capable of carrying tonnes of gold around their slender necks? I can almost hear the thoughts in the groom's head as he blinks into the camera and wonders if this the frail one for whom he lugged big shopping bags around the mall? For whom he carried popcorn cartons into the theater ? The bride stands for hours on the stage next to him, carrying on her delicate frame kilos of brocade and silk artfully wrapped around her in every conceivable manner and trailing behind her.
Wedding venues resemble Trade Fairs more and more : flashing lights , wandering people ,food outlets with different cuisines et al . I attended a wedding which had a Giant Ferris wheel installed at the entrance, ice cram kiosks and a cotton candy man turning out pink sugary clouds . I wish I had worn something more appropriate for the summer fete. As inappropriate as it may seem to wear a silk saree in the blistering Chennai heat , I wear them anyway sacrificing convenience for a greater cause . I made the mistake once by attending a distant cousin's wedding in weather - friendly clothes and minimal jewellery. I was besieged by phone calls the next day from concerned cousins , busybody aunts and overwrought uncles ; each one of them wanted to know if I had quarrelled with the cousin or had been offended by someone. All because I had not turned myself into a walking Fort Knox.
Rushing for a wedding and so more MindBlast next Monday !
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